Are You Letting Your Fear of Change Deprive You and Your Loved Ones of Life’s Treasures?
A security Team was hired to stand guard at your favorite restaurant and the only reason for it was to keep you and your family out.
Would you turn around sheepishly and go home or move forward and through the security to the owner?
Of course it’s a crazy scenario but that’s what is happening when “fear of change” is preventing you from moving forward and enjoying what life has sitting and waiting for you.
It’s your own private security force haunting you 24/7. Take that first step. Make it a little step but take it… It’s not only about you, it’s also about the people who love you.
Do you fear change because you’re comfortable with your present situation? Is it because adapting to something new could be too challenging for you ? It could be either one, but neither is a good argument.
Change isn’t a scary thing at all. Change keeps things fresh, and is a catalyst to excitement and pleasure. If things remain unchanged, they become boring and repetitive; your life becomes lost and wrapped up in a never ending cycle of consistency.
Yes, there might be a level of relaxation that is reached in this unbothered series of uniformity. But why relax? Do you really want to wake up every morning and press ‘play’, and watch your uninteresting life unfold the way it did the day prior, knowing that tomorrow will play out the same way as well?
I don’t ever want to press ‘play’, and know what is coming. That is why I embrace change. Now, I’m not saying that I change careers every few months because I can’t stand routines. It goes way beyond that. I just simply never stop looking for new opportunities, and new ways to challenge myself and excite myself.
“The deepest human defeat suffered by human beings is constituted by the difference between what one was capable of becoming and what one has in fact become.” Ashley Montagu
Things around us are changing rapidly. Yes, we have our first African-American president. We finally have stem-cell research implemented. And of course the advancement of technology is mind-blowing. The future looks so promising and exciting, and we need to all get on board and take this thrilling ride together. Find something that you are passionate about and run with it.
Don’t settle for mediocrity, and don’t fear change. . . . .Take a look at your life, and see what could use some changing.
“The only way past fear is to go through it” Author Unknown
You might be making decent money, and providing for your loved ones and yourself with a comfortable living, but are you happy? Are you happy or are you just content with your daily routine? Being content means you aren’t challenging yourself. Spice things up. Spark up conversation with different people every day. You’ll never know what kind of interesting people you can meet.
Take up a hobby that you adore. Whether it be writing or painting, jamming out to your favorite music, or taking up outdoor activities; do it and enjoy it.
Go and volunteer, and do some community work. Give back and help other people out.
Create a wish-list of things you want to do, places you want to see, people you want to meet, and things that will make your life exhilarating. Write these things down, and create the necessary changes that need to be made in your life in order to experience these wishes.
Don’t get comfortable, embrace the challenge, embrace the change and overcome the fear, because at the end of the day you’ll see, change is good. . . .For everyone!
The Formula for Success . . . 6 steps That Will Bring You What you Really Want
Why is success so elusive for most people? They make it harder than it really is , That’s why . . .
Success really is a simple process . . . . These are the 6 very powerful steps for building a powerful future.
Follow them and enjoy the success you have always dreamed of.
1- You decide what you really need. You won’t make it if you just want it. You must need it. You’re absolutely totally committed to this “need”. There is no turning back. You have done the dreaming and the research and now there is no doubt about the Vision. You’re going for it! You need it! You’re not going to let anyone or anything stop you.
2-You are willing to take extraordinary action. You don’t care how many hours in a day you have to work ,You don’t care what tasks you have to do, you don’t care how much you have to travel, you will do whatever you have to do to succeed. Anything!!!
3-You are constantly vigilant as to what is working and what is not. CONSTANTLY !!! You should quietly and calmly review your findings on a daily basis. You should keep a journal on everything you see, think, feel and even suspect. A pattern will emerge if you remain open. Expect failure and then fight like a madperson to make sure it doesn’t happen. I call this my preventative attitude. It keeps you sharp and prepared.
4-You stay Nimble and Flexible. You love your product the way it is and no matter what you’ll make people buy it. Right? Wrong! Ask questions . . .Questions will help bring the Big Bucks. Who, why, what, where, when and How. Ask…Ask…Ask. If people working with you are a wrong fit do them a favor, and yourself, and help them leave and find a job that’s right for them. Don’t fall in love with anything or anyone. It’s an attitude that is good for everyone.
5- Continue to change your approach, based on all the information you have accumulated, until you achieve your goals. If you have to change to a less glamorous course of action after hearing the reality of the situation so be it. Do Not fall in love with today . . Change is coming . . .You will always have to start “all over again” tomorrow. Get used to it.
6-NEVER, NEVER, NEVER, GIVE UP . . . . . it’s impossible, I repeat, it’s impossible to fail if you adamantly refuse to give up, give in or go home.
Follow these steps and you can’t fail.
As I said if you never give up, give in or go home there is no failure.
There is retreat though. You enable your organization to rest. You plan your next move, you review all the steps above and then launch your offensive.
Good Luck!
See you on the open road . . .
Best wishes
Barry
It Changed My Life Forever . . .
I was having coffee today with a long time friend of mine. . . . Wait, sorry to digress but . . . If you’re over 50 years old you use the term “long time friend” and if you’re under 50 you use the term “old friend” . . . just thought I’d let you in on some inside information .
Anyway, back to my story. So,my long time friend gets to talking about something that happened to her when she was in her early 20′s and it was such a poignant memory for her that she looked at me for a moment and said ” It Changed my life forever”. I can’t say what it was out of respect for her privacy but I didn’t see it as powerful an event as she did and I certainly didn’t see it as a ” Change my life forever” moment.
Wow. . . “It Changed my life forever” !!! That’s heavy stuff.
Her statement got me thinking in terms of my own life. I never really stopped and thought about events that were powerful enough to “Change my life forever”. After taking some time to think about it I actually did come up with 6 major milestones that could be considered “It changed my life forever” moments but then again I also had plenty of small ones that did also.
I sat down and started to make a list of moments in my life that stood out and this eventually made me aware of many moments that I forgot about. It was an amazing session and it’s still going on as of this moment. What’s interesting is, some of the Changes moved me forward and some appeared to move me back and sideways but it always turned out ok.
I’ve been learning some very interesting things about myself and I also became aware that each change event had no clear beginning and no clear ending. They seem to overlap and blend.
Everything in our lives is affected by Change every single minute in every single day. . .
How we view the Change and its effect is the key to success in your professional and personal lives. Let change flow by without acknowledging it or tag it as an “It changed my life forever” moment. It’s really your choice.
I’m finding that this exercise has been very emotional for me……Try it.
Take any moment in time where you remember a Change that happened . Write it down and then do the following:
1-Track it . . . .Take it forward as far as you can. See how far one change moment affects future moments. See how they’re related and connected.
2-On this journey remember the people and what effect they had or still have on your life. Think about how you felt…..Feel the experience.
3- Do it with what you would tag “It Changed my life forever” moments and minor change moments as well. You’ll be very surprised about what you’ll find especially with those minor change moments.
Everyone views change differently. Your ” It changed my life forever” moment could be someones “I don’t remember that event at all” moment. After examining your change moments I do think that you’ll find that in the long run “Change is Good” and it’s not as bad as you thought and You’ll probably come away feeling very proud of yourself.
Good Luck
Best wishes
Barry
So You Think I’m Obsessed With The Concept Of Change?
So you think I’m obsessed with the concept of Change? . . . .Part one
My blog is all about change . . . What’s important to me now is to tell you how I define , feel about and embrace change.
Please forgive me for a little bit of self promotion: I own the following trademarks “Change is Good” “Loosen up Change is Good” “Loose Change” and “Change By The People”.
I own these trademarks for all apparel ; accesories ; All “Bags” i.e. back packs, gym bags etc ; All drinking vessels and cups. . . . .You can see the start of it on my new ecommerce apparel / success support network forum website at www.changebythepeople.com . The why and how of me owning them will come at a later date if anyone is really interested.
Today my life is totally immersed in the concept of change. Why? Why am I so obsessed with the concept? I have experienced mostly “challenging” change in my life over the past 4 years. Up to that point my life was all about success, onward and upward. I rolled over and through change like nobody could and change never had a thing on me. It tried but my attitude and self confidence was impervious. Today I still refuse to believe that “success’” has walked away from me and I refuse to let Change have its way with me. It was great to me for over 54 years. I’m bent on winning and I won’t give up.
What is the definition of Change? My totally favorite definition is “The process of becoming different.” Incredibly simple. Right? So what’s all the fuss?
I still get excited about Change. To me Change is about second chances. It’s about getting up in the morning and starting all over again. It’s knowing that I have a 50/50 chance of things working out the way I want them to. The way I see it you only have two choices when it comes to Change. You can only pick one of two doors to open and walk through . . . .
Two doors only . . . . Door #1: says “Pain/Rich,Famous,Happy (embrace change and be flexible and nimble) Door #2 says: Pain/Broke, invisible, miserable ( fight it and deny it access)
Of course the “pain of change” in both cases is different for everyone. It runs from mildly annoying to devastatingly crippling.
To me the phrase “Change is Good” is about Attitude, Positive Expectancy and Hope . I use it as a metaphor to remind me to stay positive and to also remind me that tomorrow is another opportunity to start all over again.
The older I get the more I realize the impact of Attitude on life. It’s all about Attitude. We have the freedom to decide what we will do when Change knocks on or breaks down the door. We cannot change the inevitable. Change is coming ! We embrace it and play the hand we get or fight it and totally turn our life upside down. It’s your attitude that will decide which road you go down.
I believe strongly that Life is 2% what happens to us and 98 % how we react to it. The Good and Bad News? It’s your choice.
More on this subject another time . . . . .
Good Luck
See you on the open road
Best Wishes
Barry
Change Could Be Scary . . . Feel The Fear And Do It Anyway
“You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You must do the thing which you think you cannot do.” ELEANOR ROOSEVELT
One of the most debilitating yet common emotions is the emotion of fear. Fear is one of the most powerful and ominous obstacles to positive, long lasting change. Fear is one of the most significant roadblocks to becoming whatever you want to be and/or how you want to live. I don’t have a magic potion to help you but I can tell you what has worked for me.
Its power to derail our future is the reason I felt it deserved its own special spotlight. We all know what it feels like but exactly what is it? The dictionary lays it out like this: A feeling of alarm or disquiet caused by awareness or expectations of danger. Fear is used to warn you, to protect you from harm, physically or mentally. That’s it. It will not and cannot hurt you unless you mentally allow it to bully you.
Remember, we said there are no good or bad emotions. They all just have a job to do and they’re only concerned about supporting you, their master. One of my former business partners said something to me that I will never forget. We were three partners in a very large business. He said that when he is afraid it paralyzes him but when my other partner and I are afraid we keep on moving. That got me thinking . . .
I realized that courage is absolutely NOT the absence of fear BUT feeling the fear and moving forward anyway.
If I could, I would make you go to the board and write this statement 100 times.
Fear has many benefits. Fear is great for getting your adrenaline pumping to enable you to outrun some nut who wants to harm you. Fear, if used as pure atomic energy, helps for safe situations also. A challenging game of basketball, your debut on a stage, even running a competitive race can always use that intense energy.
When the adrenaline is pumping it gives you the edge you need to stay safe or win that championship game. When fear becomes so overwhelming that the physical and mental pain makes you freeze that’s a problem. The fear is not, I repeat not, stopping you. It’s not the cause of your frozen state. You and your thoughts are the cause of it. Why are you doing that to yourself? Answer that and you get a pass to move forward.
Here are some things I do to push myself forward towards my goals when I’m afraid :
1- When you feel your fear, and I say your fear because only you know what it feels like for you, you must acknowledge it, respect it and talk to it. Go to a safe, private place and question the fear out loud. “Why am I afraid? What’s going on that I’m missing or not seeing? Are you protecting me, warning me or just sending up a caution flag and need more information? What are you trying to tell me? Be patient and keep asking. The goal is to find answers.
Fear distorts the truth and truth dissolves your fear.
Questions and their answers will get you to the heart of the truths. Write down every answer you get. Have it right there in front of you.
When you do find answers don’t always expect to feel better. There may be a real danger or a risk involved but now you can think a lot more clearly and make better decisions.
2- This next question deserves a special place of its own: “What’s the worst that will happen?”
This is the main question for getting you to feel the fear but move forward anyway. In addition to the questions in number one, this question should be asked by itself, and record every answer no matter how crazy it sounds. Who knows, you may find out things are not that bad.
3- Get someone to lean on. Get moral support. Get someone to be there to be your cheerleader. You need credible, positive adults around you. I have a few friends I go to but I get most of my “support” from authors of great articles that you can find on “article websites.” I print and keep them in folders by category: Success, support, persistence Etc. Etc.
When I get scared or just sad I pull my articles out for mental nourishment. They are my Mastermind Group. Books that inspire you should be read and mark the pages that make you feel good. Go back to them 100 times a day if you need to. You do whatever you have to do to move FORWARD.
4- Get out and be active. Take positive steps towards your goals. Opportunity does not make house calls. Being out there will allow opportunity to find you. Go exercise if you can. Being active will help you feel better and besides you never know what’s out there for you.
The Main Point . . .The key is to be able to always MOVE forward. Courage is not the absence of fear; it is feeling the fear and moving forward anyway. You’re the ONE. It’s all up to you. YOU can do it!
Good Luck!!!
See you on the open road
Best Wishes
Barry
